After a long hard day of work every man has to unwind, some enjoy a cold beer while relaxing in front of the T.V., catching up on shows they missed. Some enjoy enjoy reading their favorite novel in a dark secluded place while enjoying the quite, some even enjoy building and repairing things in their garage. Me, well, lets just say I have my own peculiar indulgences. What I like to do to unwind, is to hunt, but I don’t hunt animals oh no my prey is special it can only be hunted when everyone goes to bed, otherwise ide be caught and I don’t even want to imagine what would happen if I got caught. I don’t just like hunting my prey, the best part comes after I’ve captured it; I love to smell my preys sweet and spicy aroma, I love to listen to the sounds it makes when I cut into it, I love to watch as its sweet succulent juices seep out of its open cuts, what I love most about my prey is the taste of its flesh as I roll my tongue over it and savor its decedent flavor. I love my prey best when its just been pulled from the oven, its outsides are crispy and its insides are warm and soft; but I can’t have it that way most of the time, I can only experience that on special occasions, lest people get suspicious of my activities.
As I lay awake at night I can’t help thinking about prey. Should I go for it tonight? I thought to myself, I’ve already done it once today, twice might be pushing it. But it tastes so good, I think it would be worth the risk.
After much debate desire eventually won over reason and I prepared myself for the hunt. First I need to make sure my wife is a sleep I thought as I leaned over to her side of the bed listen for the sound of her soft snores.
Good, I thought after I heard them. After confirming she was asleep I slowly brought back the convers and slide out off bed, hoping that my jostling doesn’t wake her. So far so good I thought as I pushed my slippers on and made my way out the room.
First I have to get my tools I remind my self and I made my way to the room where they were kept, upon reaching place where they were stored I slowly pulled the drawer open, trying to make as little noise as possible then claimed my tools, I made my way to the next drawer and repeated the proses, I then made my way to the cabinet and and claimed my second to last tool. The last one was tricky though, because the moment I opened the door the light would automatic turn on, I was going to have to be quick. Done, whew, I could relax now, the hard part was over. I now had all my tools and my wife was still asleep. Now on to the hunt.
I quickly found my prey, as I peered at my prey through the glass my started to conscience act up; should I really be doing this? what would my wife think if she saw me? it probably isn’t good for my health either doing this, especially at night I don’t get enough sleep as it is. These thoughts crept into the forefront of my mind. No, no, I already decided to do this, and its to late to turn back now, I reminded my self and steeled my resolve. As I made my way closer and closer to my unsuspecting prey, almost drooling in anticipation of the feast, the lights suddenly came on and a voice cut through the eerie silence making me freeze in place.
“Daniel carver, it is 3 A.M., are you going four another piece of pie,” my wife coldly stated.
Quickly trying recover from the shock of being caught, I tried to deny it “Psssh of course not, honey, why would you think that?”
“Oh and I suppose those aren’t, a fork, plate, pie server, and cool whip your trying to hide behind your back.”
“Wa—ah---,“ knowing I’ve been caught, I sighed in resignation as I slowly brought the items she stated out from behind me.
“That’s what I thought, now put them back and go back to bed. Your banned from pie for the foreseeable future.”
Sighing again I replied “yes dear.” And went on to return the items to their respective places.
Before heading back up stares I took one last look at the delicious apple pie under its protective glass cover and though to myself,
you’ve survived this night apple pie, but I will return and next time you will be mine!